What’s it all about ?

This page is about me, the creator of this page. I have no idea about what you expect to find here so you better read on if you want to know more. The creator of this site is me, Ivy. For your information that’s just a alias as I don’t feel like sharing my real name. Let’s get to the point. I’m a crossdresser/transgendered person. If you don’t know what that is, then I’ll leave some short explanations.

Crossdressing

Cross-dressing is the wearing of clothing and other accessories commonly associated with the other gender within a particular society.

Transgender

Transgender is the state of one’s “gender identity” (self-identification as woman, man, or neither) not matching one’s “assigned sex” (identification by others as male or female based on physical/genetic sex).

If you still don’t know what I’m talking about, it just means that I tend to, or rather often wear clothes which doesn’t belong to my gender according to society. Nor do I really feel like the gender I was born with. On the other hand, I’m not disgusted by my own gender and I can perfectly well live my life as a guy. But if I had a choice in the matter, I’d definitely be a girl. That I know for sure.

How I became aware of these feelings

It all started when I was around 5 or 6 years old. Not exactly sure, but around that time. Yes, I was that young. Did I know what these feelings were? Not at all. But yes, it all started out with a pair of pantyhose I accidentally came to touch when I was in the bathroom. I was kind of fascinated by the fabric and one day I came to take a pair and try them late one night. I still remember that time and how it felt. It was an amazing feeling and i loved how my legs looked. From there on I went on to trying pantyhose on more frequently and also ended up sleeping with it on every night.

The following years

The years went by and I started to reach puberty. I still was enjoying wearing pantyhose, but it wasn’t the same as before. It was about this time that I went on to try more clothing such as tops, bras, jeans, dresses and so on. Thank god that I have sisters! haha. I found out that I felt excited every time as well as enjoying it. From here on out it only went on to me buying stuff myself whenever I had money and an opportunity.  I used to have my own private dress-up time every other night in my room when everyone else was asleep in the house. This was something I always felt happy about and looked forward to.

Mental “breakdown”

When I was around 16-17 years old  I had a sort of mental breakdown. Not literally, but I guess I can call it that. Through puberty I became more aware of my own feelings and in addition to various problems at home the stress level increased. In the end I couldn’t cope with it all and to top it off the girl inside of me wanted out. She wanted to be acknowledged. So it was either that, or losing it completely. Before I had the courage to tell anyone about my secret habits and my secret other self, I tried to kill myself. Luckily I didn’t manage to do that, otherwise you wouldn’t be reading this text right now. 😉

Letting it out

One day I took the courage to tell my parents and sisters, as well as my grandparents and one of my aunts. They all took it very well and my sisters and my aunt are very supportive. I’m sure that my parents are supportive as well, but this is all very confusing to them I’m sure, so therefore I’m not pushing it onto them. After I told my family about it, and a lot of my friends as well I felt MUCH better. Today I tell almost anyone, if I feel I can trust them, and I think this is the way to go with it as well. Because hey, I’m still me no matter how I appear, right ? 🙂

Thoughts onwards

I’m not sure what I’ll do in the future. Will I do something about it ? Not sure. Am I content with how my life is right now ? Sure, I can live on like this. As long as I get time to treat myself and my other side, I’ll manage.

To end this short summary, you can ask me anything if there’s something you’re wondering about. 🙂